Hello, and welcome to another edition of Twisted News. In this issue, I am sitting down with a very near and dear friend who lives in my backyard (not really)—even though that would be awesome! However, I do picture fairies dancing as the flames of the fire lick at our feet. Too far off, maybe not, as we endure the heat of Las Vegas together.
I bring to the table Mrs. Mercedes M. Yardley, who is a fellow writer (a damn good one at that) and a whimsical dark fantasist who wears stilettos, red lipstick, and poisonous flowers in her hair. She is dark and fantastical but also known as (aka) Miss Murder. As she speaks, her words weave whimsical notes that leave you entranced in her presence.
Her beautiful list of achievements also comes with a list of accolades. One award in particular, and this lady has it not only once BUT twice! A winning author of:
Bram Stoker Finalist for Superior Achievement in Short Fiction – Loving You Darkly (2018)
Bram Stoker Award for Long Fiction – Little Dead Red (2015)
Reddit Fantasy Stabby Award Winner for Best Short Fiction – Apocalyptic Montessa and Nuclear Lulu: A Tale of Atomic Love (2013)
Wow, what a huge accomplishment. How did it feel to find out you were nominated for the Bram Stoker award and then winning it?
MMY: It felt really good but surreal. The first award especially. There seemed to be a game where the inner circle tended to be nominated and win, and I wasn’t in the inner circle. So, I didn’t expect to be nominated for Little Dead Red. I was so sure I would not win that I didn’t write a speech. It was my first nomination, and they called my name because I had won. I was not prepared. I wore these insanely tall heels that I could barely walk in. I ‘galumph’ up there and say, “I don’t have a speech, but thank you.” It was this moment of seeing my work validated by people I respected, and I will never forget it. I remember people stood up and clapped for me. They had jumped to their feet, and I never felt quite so supported in my whole life. I was nominated and made the final ballot for four awards, and I won fifty percent of them. This last time, I couldn’t even go to the award ceremony because I was helping to prepare for the youth dance for our church. I was decorating and cleaning when my phone went off, and people told me I had won. It was wonderful.
My friend accepted the award for me, and I got to watch it later. People not in this field are like, “Oh, that’s fun. You write your little stories.” People who are not readers, who don’t care or understand that it’s hard, tend to think it’s fun all the time. They do not take it seriously as a job or a career, so to have people who understand the ins and outs of it say, “Yeah, your work means something. I read your work, and it affected me; it made me feel things, and we think you are worthy of this prestigious award.” It made me look at myself in a different way. No matter what happens, those awards are mine; I won them, and they can never take them away. I can be on my deathbed and be like this is what I did.
AH: That is awesome. I’m proud of you because it is a huge accomplishment, and having that validation means something to who you are as a person.
What made you want to write?
MMY: I’ve always written; I don’t know how not to write. It’s how I process. For me, not writing is like being mute and not using my voice. It was how I communicated. It was natural. I was always a dark little girl.
AH: Did you find it as a therapy tool to help use words instead of saying them out loud?
MMY: No. I’ve never had a problem expressing myself. My mom used to work at a newspaper. She would take me with her when she worked after hours because I was too little to be left at home. I had to be quiet, so I had this typewriter and would type and type. I remember giving my mom a whole book I had written when I was around eight years old and said, “Here, Mom, read this thing I wrote,” and it was pages and pages and pages.
What is your favorite thing about writing?
MMY: Someone once told me that people are divided into two groups: the ones who like the product and those who like the process. I like the process. I like sitting there and being lost in an alternate reality or universe. I love getting into that groove and the feeling of disconnect when everything is quiet and the kids are gone or occupied. But when I come away from it, especially if I am in a really good session, it’s like I’m drunk. But I love being somewhere else. I want to feel that way forever. That’s my addiction.
AH: You describe it well. I have to be submerged, and if I’m pulled out, I have to establish my bearings, “Where am I? What’s going on?”
MMY: It’s like being woken up from a deep sleep.
AH: Exactly.
Your first published book was Beautiful Sorrows, an anthology. When did the idea first materialize?
MMY: Interesting. The book came out in 2012. I would get this short story idea, write it, and then put it away. I did that multiple times before I asked myself if there was enough for a book. At the time, I was working for Shock Totem. I shared my idea of putting all the short stories I had written and publishing them in a collection, and they said, “Wait, we want to publish books. Let us practice with you, and you practice with us.” It was the best book publishing experience I had. It was completely different from how I thought my first book would be. I was in the mindset that this is what you are supposed to do: sit down, write a novel start to finish, go through it, get an agent, and do all this stuff. The writing industry doesn’t treat you as a real writer unless you are writing novels. Beautiful Sorrows came out, and I still was not considered a writer until my first novel was published. It was a joyful thing that snuck in the back door when I wasn’t looking.
What is your favorite story or prize possession piece, and why?
MMY: I just had thirty stories come to mind. Pretty Little Dead Girls is one of my favorites. The Boy Who Hangs the Stars is another; it’s a little charming one. Apocalyptic Montessa and Nuclear Lulu is another one I really like, as well. There are some you write, and you’re like, okay, I wrote this because there was a call, or my publisher told me to; then there are some where these characters exist to you, where you care about them, and they give you a glimpse into their universe. That would be my why.
I have one coming out in my collection called Clocks. It’s based on the old Grimm’s Fairy Tale, The Story of a Boy Who Went Forth to Learn Fear. It’s about a kid who doesn’t understand what fear is, so he tries to figure it out. Ghosts are talking to him, saying, “We are going to murder you,” and he’s not afraid because what is fear? He doesn’t understand that emotion. Clocks is about a boy with autism whose mother dies. He goes out experiencing the world without his mom, who kept him safe. I wrote it about my eldest, who has Williams syndrome and autism and does not process things in a neurotypical manner. Clocks is one of my favorites. It’s dear to my heart, and I have a lot of trepidation about releasing it because it’s personal.
Who is your inspiration, or is there anyone you look to for advice in the writing world?
MMY: This isn’t literary but the Tim Burton and Danny Elfman dynamic. It’s dark and whimsical, almost like a joyous darkness. I really appreciate Michaelbrent Collings; he is a horror writer and works hard. He’s savvy and an upstanding individual, always uplifting people around him. I’ll say, “I don’t know how to market this,” and he will respond, “Oh, here’s what worked for me.” I admire that. Regarding writing, I’m inspired by people who let their joy come through, but I have always gone my own way.
What advice can you give others trying to find their place on the path to writing?
MMY: Do not shut your mind to anything. I’m firmly entrenched in the horror genre, and there is a stigma about horror. I always thought I couldn’t write horror because there was always a negative connotation to it. When I wrote my stories, I realized they were horror, so I embraced what naturally came from my soul. We put ourselves in boxes because the industry classifies our material according to genre. We think, “Oh, I can’t write this idea or that idea.” I think that stunts us as writers. Everything straddles genres so much that I think it’s a marketing ploy. That’s the only reason we really do it. My stuff, for example, has romance, horror, thriller, and magical surrealism, so where do you put that on a shelf? I write what makes me happy and figure out the rest later.
AH: Sometimes, I will come across an idea that won’t fit the horror genre, but it’s an idea I need to get out of my head. It turns out good, but my name is attached to horror. I do not want to be defined as just horror; I have lots of ideas. I wish there would be a separate box titled Misfits or something.
MMY: As artists and authors, we are multifaceted. We can’t just define ourselves down to this is what I am, or I will stick to this one thing. That’s not how humanity works. But we still try to do it with our writing.
AH: I agree; it stifles a lot of people and may even create writer’s block because then, as the author, you are stuck thinking this is all I can write, and the ideas might not flow as easily.
MMY: I’ve been pigeonholed. Do not pigeonhole yourself or let anyone pigeonhole you.
How about any cons to the industry?
MMY: I always say this. If you are at a Con, do not ever do anything that puts yourself in jeopardy. Prioritize your safety. I feel I have missed writing opportunities because I don’t go to people’s back rooms late at night. I don’t want to be in a room with drunk strangers, even if they are talking shop. The 2 a.m. parties are where the wheeling and dealing happens. They are where the ideas for literary projects come up. But there were claims of assault at every single Con I’ve ever been to, and I’ve had too many friends put in terrible positions trying to enhance their careers. So, I’ve missed opportunities, but I have been safe.
Also, look at things carefully, do your research, and don’t be afraid to ask about a publisher or someone you might work with. Talk to people because there are some bad apples out there. We just had a dozen people in the industry revealed as offenders or harassers. Nobody wanted to believe it. We all want to think things are great.
AH: We want to believe that no one will have bad intentions. If we work hard, we will get what we want, but sometimes, working hard means protecting yourself.
MMY: You think everyone is going to be honest. But some people don’t pay you. People steal your work and run, and say shameful things about you, and insult you. You must watch out for all this.
AH: Another one is to trust your instinct. Sure, those people might seem super nice, so what could go wrong? The reality is that so much could go wrong.
MMY: I tell my kids they can walk away from things. If you’re on a date and feel hinky about it, leave. If you’re at an appointment and the doctor is acting skeevy, leave. If you’re with friends and something is going down, you don’t have to be there. I think this knowledge has changed their lives. My kids are not going to be murdered. I want my children to be safe. If they need an out, it’s okay to say I’m out. They know they can call Mom anytime, and I will pick them up no matter what.
AH: Don’t put yourself in a traumatized situation if you know you can walk out the door. There is nothing wrong with it.
MMY: You want to be with people who will protect you, and you will protect them, people who will respect you, and you will respect them. And for those who need it, this is your permission; you can leave.
Where do you see yourself in ten years?
MMY: I want to have more books out. Sometimes, I have to stop and define what success is for me. My definition of success is being able to write what I want. I’m in this wonderful place now. I don’t want to be stuck writing things I don’t care about because I have to fill a quota, or it will advance my career. I spent so long writing what I thought people expected of me, and I was unhappy. I just finished my latest novel. It’s a strange book, but it’s what I wanted to write. So, I see writing as what I want and as being happy.
To piggyback off the last question, where would you feel fulfilled in your career? What does that look like for you?
MMY: When I say I want to write whatever I want, I also mean everything. I have a children’s book in the works. I would love to create another one where I watercolor the illustrations. That would be really fun and something new. I’m working with an illustrator to create a giant graphic novel. I’m working on a movie script. I don’t want to feel constrained to do one thing; I want to do it all. More importantly, I want to model to my kids that adults can learn. So, I want to grow, expand, and do all those things I was too afraid to try. I’m not afraid anymore. Maybe I’m old enough that I don’t care about looking silly.
AH: Do you think that as you get older, you don’t hold onto those stigmas, that they’re more for you instead of them?
MMY: Yeah, I think so. I have lost a lot of friends who never fulfilled their dreams. One of my best friends died when we were twenty-three, and it was so fast and sudden. She was a wonderful writer and did not get to see anything come to fruition. Sometimes, I feel I have to live a little bit harder for her. She’s one of the reasons I wrote Pretty Little Dead Girls; I always thought I would die young, but she did. Fate made a mistake and took the wrong person. There isn’t enough time to be afraid anymore. Things are crazy in this world, and your time isn’t guaranteed.
What is next for you?
MMY: Oh man, I’m querying a new novel and looking for a new agent, which I haven’t done in quite some time. I have a book coming out next month, which I’m really excited about. I’m taking the opportunity to try new things.
Mercedes, thank you for joining me and giving the world insight into who you are. As always, I enjoy spending time with you, but I would like to take a moment to give you your flowers. Sometimes, we don’t stop to appreciate one another in life.
Besides being a friend, I have been a fan for a long time. I applaud what you brought to the pages and the emotions I
felt along the way. Life has not been the absolute best to you at times, but you have managed to change any negative situation that would knock any average person on their ass and made it the best thing that has happened to you. You are such an amazing person for having lived through it all. I admire what you have built for yourself and your family and the little breadcrumbs you leave behind that someone like me can find and enjoy—the little nuggets of information. You are a huge inspiration, and your heart and mind are such a beautiful piece of art that I find myself living up to being a better person. I appreciate everything you have done and thank you for being you.
MMY: Thank you! Can I give you your flowers?
AH: Sure. (As I blush).
MMY: I think you are a freaking rockstar, you are one of the strongest people I know, and I hate that you have to be, but you do it with so much grit and grace. I think you are a Twister of Mystery, a force of nature, a tsunami, and I’m so glad you are my friend. When everything feels like this (moves hands all around), you come into the situation and make the air breathable for people. You bring things to an organization where it is livable, where it wouldn’t have been without you. I think you are phenomenal. Thank you for being my friend.
(Cue the waterworks)!
What leaves your mind twisted?
Until next time!
You can follow her on social media:
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mercedes.murdockyardley
X (Twitter): @mercedesmy
Instagram: @mercedesmy
Website: www.MercedesMYardley.com
Check out some of her previous titles of work:
‒https://www.amazon.com/Beautiful-Sorrows-Mercedes-M-Yardley/dp/193700953X
‒https://www.amazon.com/Apocalyptic-Montessa-Nuclear-Lulu-Atomic/dp/1944784969
‒https://www.amazon.com/Nameless-Darkness-Mercedes-M-Yardley-ebook/dp/B01920V548
‒https://www.amazon.com/Pretty-Little-Dead-Girls-Murder-ebook/dp/B01C7UC27O
‒https://www.amazon.com/Little-Dead-Red-Mercedes-Yardley-ebook/dp/B019PE2UAO
‒https://www.amazon.com/Darling-Mercedes-M-Yardley/dp/1645481190
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